An evening in Danok (Thailand)...

I have never felt so angry, so ashamed of my own country, my own people, my own Malaysian to be précised. Male, all of races from Malaysia. recent survey shows that most male come from Malaysia visits Thailand for sex services. (Noted that I used the word male, not men because, particularly, they are not men, they put themselves at par with other animals of their kind).

And they come for a reason, or two..Sex, pleasure, and sex. Sex and pleasure always come in one package. Women from Malaysia, come to Hadnyai for beautification. Hatnyai is very famous for its cheap surgery, yet effective. One example, Liposuction in Malaysia can cost about RM2, 500 to Rm5, 000 per session, while in hatnyai Rm1,000 per session. Tummy tucked is about RM2,500, and imagine what in Malaysia could be.

To see Malaysian faces in Thailand is blessing, as u can ease your tense and fatigue by speaking your own language. Not so many Thai can speak English, except for some well-educated pharmacist, and surgeons. Malay speakers are rare. but to see male Malaysian faces with Thai female escorts is a totally gross and sad experience mixed together, and I don’t know whether to curse at them being a male chauvinist or simply walk to them saying “shame on you, and your p**is, and may you be blessed with herpes and other sexual transmitted disease. Wish I could have the gut to say so.

Why I’m so sure that they are Malaysian? And they only come to Thailand for sex and pleasure? Firstly, some of them speak Malay, and if they are from other races, at the immigration check up, they hold Malaysian passport. Those who came all the way from as far as Johor by car, their cars bear the Malaysian registration numbers. My encounter at the parking space in front of so called SPA proved this claim. Or if anyone doesn’t believe me, you can take a look.
And they are not coming for family holiday. Well, every Malaysian knows what Hatnyai, Danok are famous for, if not a heaven to satisfy men’s sexual need, as if they can’t be satisfied with one, single loyal spouse, or at least, by masturbation.

They don’t come with their father, or mother, or son, or daughter or wife.But they come in one pack of people of their kind. Upon arrival, they book a female social escort or, in impolite language, prostitute, for at least three days. Whenever they ran out of money, they seek help from any Thai motorcyclists to bring them to Bukit Kayu Hitam Duty Free, where an ATM Maybank Machine is located. The charge varies from 8 to 10 ringgit. During the stay, they generously lavish that women with luxury, shopping and extra money in exchange for sex services offered.

My short interviews with them reveal some facts. They come from middle class social background, ranging from farmers, lower grade business men to government servants, and even police officers which I knew by their famous engraved belt with PDRM logo, despite of wearing plain cloth collared t-shirt. (They later admit working at narcotic department from bukit Aman, and are on duty. Well, I wonder if the duty covers washing hair at a red light district beauty parlour) luckily, I managed to snap photos with them, in front of a beauty parlour. At red light district area, in Hatnyai. (notice the Mercs benz they parked in front of the shop)

I guess many of Malaysian knows this fact, but like me, they have no idea how it happen, till they have a chance to see it. This is my 2nd visits, and yet I guess it’s already a gruesome experience for me. Who’s to blame? Is it the male for being Chauvinists and could not be able to control their lust?
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to answer this ever lamented question, and I guess, everyone has the answers... “tepuk dada tanya iman, tepuk dahi tanya akal...”

after all people, all of us are going to face the judgment day and obliged to answer to our Creator...all by ourselves, no lawyers or sort of..only we n our deeds, amal ibadah yang mukhlis..

What bothers me..(Part II)

What bothers me.. (part II)

Remember, marriage is not only about making children, but to nurture them with good morals and attitudes. This should be emphasized during kursus kahwin, but normally the ustaz tend to neglect this topic, and prefer interesting topic of sex, intercourse and sex. Many parents lament only when children had reached adolescent stage as they find it difficult to mould them at this stage. We must remember it is extremely difficult to teach the child and refine his character once puberty is passed. As a malay proverb goes, “ melentur buluh biarlah dari rebung”, which literally translate, to bend a bamboo must began with bending the bamboo shoot.

However difficult things maybe, we all have a part to play in supporting our young. We need to promote the role of family. And children must be told their boundaries at early age, be it their parents and teachers. Most of the youth of today are not doing anything productive in their lives and will cost the taxpayers a fortune in the future. It is imperative that once children drop out school, which became rampant these days (curious enough, maybe the government should have strong polices in place with regard to education and training), that they are given ample opportunity in training so that they can make a healthy contribution towards the labour force.

But at the first place, government must curb this problem. It saddens me to see student at early age not interested to go to school. And most of them are my own race. I love my own race, and that’s why I care. Sometime I hate politician for letting so much entertainment aired on our television. As if it’s not bad enough, they have 24 hours programme on Astro, and again, the parents do nothing to discern what channels their children watch. So much reality programs on TV which promotes hedonism, that the youth might think entertainment are far more important than study. Moreover, they almost forget the truth of Muslim belief, the life after death, the hereafter. This is applicable to the Agenda Setting theory of communication, where the audience might think what shown on the Medias important thing to care off. And that is entertainment they like to watch the most.

Our children are growing up in a world where there is little censure to show them the difference between right and wrong. The crimes that we read on a daily basis are the symptoms of the malady. If we do not come up with a long term answers and if we do not act now, begin with nurturing the early stage of a child’s life, our youth will be damned to a dismal future. And who’s to blame at when this happen? They will surely finger pointed at us.

And if such and such happen, almost nothing ca be done to cure and curb social ills among youth for it is no use to cry over splitting milk. A marriage is a sacred institution. Don’t taint it with our own unforgiving mistake.

With care,

Aisya Zaharin

What bothers me..(part I)

Marriage in Islam is not just about to legalize what is haram (illegal), zina, or to have intercourse out of wedlock. It is more than that. It covers every aspect of a Muslim life, from the very beginning of the marriage like how to choose a spouse till how to raise children according to Quranic verses and assunnah. But true to be said, as I quote s a statement by former Perlis

Mufti, Dr Asri in one of his articles in Mingguan Malaysia, “the only Islamic thing most of Malay practise in a marriage is during ceremonial of marriage (akad nikah), and latter, when happen, on how to dissolve a marriage which goes under the jurisdiction of Syariah court.

The problem in Malay society, especially some of Malay girls, they thought when they come to age of 27; they think they are too old to get married. And after 30’s, no man wants to marry them. This nonsensical thought made them to rush into a marriage without much consideration of the consequences. They pick any guy who they think suitable to b married, they hardly even know the history of these guys ( well, guys are known to hide their true colour for some time, for the sake of winning one’s heart). Lucky if they married to a good person. Otherwise, a hell on earth has just begun. It seems like gambling one’s life to me. For heaven’s sake marriage is not on the cloud 9 all of time. And why get married if you are to suffer at the end of it? That is why we need a strong back up plan if anything happen after a sacred matrimonial ceremony.

And come to children. True, a child is a gift from Allah s.w.t, but Islam allows Muslims to plan a birth. Today hectic world is different from our moyang world, where u can simply have many children so that the children can help them in paddy field for example. Today, you have got to really plan your family so that you can give a better future for the children, which begin with better education. And a good education doesn’t come in a cheap price.

My mother is a teacher at a local daily secondary school, once or twice I passed the school to send her, and it is a sad scene to see the school goers behaving uncontrollably wild. They smoked cigarettes, flirted around; none of them were seeing reading books, or, at least, newspaper. Nowadays, parents are too busy with their careers and in their pursuit of wealth. Of course, it’s justifiable, as the mother and father need to work to make ends meet in this economic situation.

But what happen when parents don’t spend quality time with their children? They are not able to watch over and protect their children. They also cannot bring them worth good morals, including the virtue of humankind. In this way, the children will not be inculcated with good values and traits. Rather, they will grow into undisciplined and wayward children. This could be worse when a family have so many children to look after. Parents, despite of the responsibility to the children, they have other big responsibility, which to look after their own parents. Their parents might be sick, and maybe stay together with them forming a nucleus family. With so many children, this sacred job must be done fairly.

Worse come to worse, if both parents’ monthly income doesn’t meet the need of their children. What are the consequences of such situation? Children are neglected; they children are always left to fend for themselves and to solve their numerous problems alone. There was a report recently, how a teenager in Sabak Bernam high on drugs and caught in a hotel with cellophane contains videos of herself in a sex act.

This is the latest trend of crimes involving young people in our society. These crimes are being reported with such alarming regularity that is worrying. Why is the youth in our society so afflicted by drugs and sex? Where and how has it all gone wrong with these young people? They seem to act without a moral compass.

And what happened to the adults in their lives – Their parents, grandparents, teachers and the elders in the community? Perhaps, some of these elder people, they don’t show good moral values to the youth, caused the youth confused and blame the adult should they commit an error. As simple as this, a child, when scolded for loitering after school, might blame his or her father for sitting at kedai kopi, doing nothing but chatting nonstop hour by hour with friends.

Bad parenting and living in a difficult environment, the effects of which will be exacerbated during this recession, will further contribute towards failure to our society. Both adults and children scar mentally and emotionally. Parents should not deprive themselves of the sacred duty to raise good children, it is a God-given responsibility which they cannot at any cost neglect or overlook, especially during the formative years of a child.

To any Malay girl that feel offended by this article, please don’t be. It is the time for you to change, and select your spouse by your head, instead of your heart and lust.

Towards a caring society

Aisya Zaharin